KNOK BOOK

Knock! Knock! Book! Book!

Within a book, within a place, within a flower.

Sonia Choquette – Raspunsul este simplu

“O inima lucida este o inima creativa. Cand ai inima lucida, poti face conexiuni subtile si poti sesiza relatiile ascunse dintre lucruri. Incepi sa intelegi ce se petrece in spatele mastilor pe care si le pun oamenii si poti face alegeri mai bune legate de felul in care doresti sa reactionezi fata de ei. Altfel spus, iesi din starea de haos si din confuzia care inconjoara orice autovictimizare. Dacai ai inima lucida, iti poti afirma puterea creatoare si capacitatea de a face alegeri constiente.

Limpezirea inimii nu este deloc complicata. Tot ce trebuie sa faci in acest scop este sa treci de la intrebarea: “De ce mi se intampla mie toate acestea?” la intrebarile “De ce se intampla toate aceste lucruri? Care este relatia dintre cauza si efect, dintre algerile facute de mine si rezultatele obtinute?”, sau si mai bine “Ce lectie trebuie sa invat din aceasta situatie?”

Analizeaza, nu reactiona pur si simplu. Detaseaza-te de drama existentiala si priveste obiectiv provocarile cu care te confrunta viata. Asta nu inseamna ca nu mai trebuie sa simti nimic. Sentimentele fac parte integranta din fiinta noastra si ne ofera informatii pretioase in legatura cu algerile pe care le facem. Spre exemplu, daca te simti deprimat, iti poti da seama ca ti-ai neglijat sanatatea si ti-ai ignorat propriile nevoi. Daca te simti furios, iti poti da seama ca nu ti-ai respectat propriile hotare si ca va trebuie sa iti reconsideri teritoriul privat in care ceilalti nu au dreptul sa calce. Daca te simti iritat sau nerabdator, iti poti da seama ca o anumita situatie este confuza sau ca nu este autentica. Beneficiile limpezirii inimii sunt foarte numeroase. Printre altele, stresul se reduce, vitalitatea se amplifica, iar energia se reechilibreaza. Cu cat te simti mai lucid in inima ta, cu atat mai plina devine viata ta. Inima este cea care iti da putere si iti stimuleaza creativitatea. Daca ea este confuza si percepe realitatea ca prin ceata, este greu sa gasesti solutiile potrivite pentru problemele tale. Nu faci decat sa te invartesti la infinit in acelasi cerc vicios al suferintei. Desi autovictimizarea este foarte atragatoare pentru ego, ea nu reprezinta altceva decat o pierdere de timp. Dintr-o inima confuza si incetosata nu poate iesi nimic bun. Pe de alta parte, nimic nu intuneca mai tare inima si nu submineaza mai puternic iubirea de sine ca frica. In clipa in care te temi de ceva, inima se intuneca si devine confuza. Experienta m-a invatat ca noi nu trebuie sa depasim frica pentru a ne limpezi inima. Tot ce trebuie sa facem este sa sesizam momentul in care ni s-a facut frica si sa recunoastem prezenta acestui sentiment in inima noastra. Pentru mine, a fost o revelatie sa imi dau seama ca nu atat frica este distructiva pentru iubirea noastra de sine, cat tentativa de a o ascunde sau de a o nega.

Frica este o emotie normala, mai ales daca ne aflam in fata necunoscutului. Imi amintesc, de pilda, de seara de dinaintea zilei in care trebuia sa tin primul meu seminar de o zi in Sydney, Australia. Intreaga zi m-am simtit tensionata si nelinistita. Desi am dormit in acea dupa-amiaza, m-am trezit complet neodihnita si usor iritata. Dintr-o data, mi-am dat seama de ce ma simt astfel: imi era teama. De indata ce am recunoscut acest lucru, am descoperit o sumedenie de motive care stateau la baza fricii mele. Imi era teama: ca nu voi reusi sa captivez atentia auditoriului, ca nu voi reusi sa imi transmit eficient mesajul, ca nu voi reusi sa ii ghidez pe oameni catre mai multa lumina.

Pe scurt, imi era teama de orice. Cu cat deveneam insa mai constienta de temerile mele, cu atat mai mult pareau sa slabeasca acestea si cu atat mai limpede redevenea inima mea. De indata ce s-a limpezit, inima mi-a spus: “Da, toate aceste lucruri se pot intampla. Nu este foarte probabil, dar nici imposibil. Dar chiar daca s-ar intampla, de ce consideri acest lucru o nenorocire? La urma urmelor, nu va fi sfarsitul lumii.” Era foarte adevarat. Ar fi fost cu siguranta o situatie neplacuta, care mi-ar fi creat o stare de disconfort, dar, in ultima instanta, chiar daca acest scenariu s-ar fi adeverit in varianta lui cea mai negativa, nu ar fi fost decat o palma pentru egoul meu. Acest gand m-a facut sa rad. Intr-adevar, multe din temerile noastre nu sunt altceva decat amenintari la adresa egoului nostru, care si asa se simte nesigur pe el. Daca am reusi sa ne aducem aminte in asemenea momente ca noi suntem una cu Spiritul Divin, nu cu egoul nostru, am scapa instantaneu de aceste spaime egotice. Cu cat devenim mai constienti de temerile noastre, cu iubire si cu o doza de umor, cu atat mai palide devin ele si cu atat mai mult se limpezeste inima noastra.”

KNOK BOOK

Knock! Knock! Book! Book!

Within a book, within a place, within a flower.

Daniel Lapin – Business Secrets from the Bible

King Solomon says: “There is no utterly righteous man on Earth who achieves any good without sinning.” Solomon is not saying that there is no righteous men. There are plenty. He is saying that there are no righteous man who achieve anything without sinning. You must interact with the world to achieve things and doing so means inevitable sinning and inevitable missteps because we are fallible. The only way to avoid doing anything wrong ever is to do nothing. Do not build a family. Don’t start a business. Lock yourself away in a cave and don’t do anything. Then, I suppose, there is the likelihood that you will be able to die totally without sin, other than the sin of locking yourself in a cave, of course. (And doing nothing is a sin, make no mistake. I would argue it is the worst kind because it means you are not serving God’s other children.)

If you’re out there in the world living life passionately, committed to your life, passionately committed to your family and your community, passionately committed to your career and your business, you are going to make mistakes. It’s going to happen. And you know what? So what! You will make a mistake, suffer a setback, and then move on from there, wiser for the experience. There is no need to fear the path forward. Eliminate the fear that you have of making mistakes and simply travel forward and be the best working professional, the best husband or wife, the best father or mother, that you can be and it will all work out in the end. Make fear your friend. We cannot allow ourselves to be paralyzed by terror, yet remember that ordinary fear is quite normal. Don’t allow fear to terrify you and what is more important, know that you can find happiness in fear. It is evidence that you are not a vegetable. Were you not striving towards goals and if you had no dreams, you’d have little fear. The presence of fear can bring a small private smile to your face. You know what is going on and you know how to allow it to lift you to new heights.”

THIS AND THAT

We don’t want everything we like, we just remember the beautiful things.

We like this and that this week:

  • I’ve been gathering small stones to have a vivid memory of certain places that I really enjoyed along the way, but my mind stopped when I discovered a lovely account on Instagram with mesmerizing stones. You could easily put five different stones together and create the pallete of your dreams for your specific creation. Have a look at @avery_a_gregory

  • Beautiful graphics can sometimes soften and spoil the senses. Sadie Benning (Born April 11, 1973) is an American artist who lives and works in New York. “I want to be free to try things that don’t make sense yet.” Check “his abstract” on this link and taste some absolutely pink from this exquisite art.

  • A classic beauty can be manufactured in the shape of wood and rattan. “Cask” collection of lounge furniture for Expormim by Norm Architects can be admired right here.

  • There is a unique place In Paris that I completely like and it can be described in three words: cabaret, history, hill. “Au Lapin Agile”(1860) is the oldest cabaret in Paris located in a small house where so many sculptors, painters, singers, writers used to meet. No wonder is the oldest cabaret in Paris. You can read about the history of this enchanting place and have a closer look by opening a window of the present and the past.

THERE’S ONLY TODAY

There’s only today, isn’t it? It’s all about what we are and do today.

Everything we want is available, so if we ask, seek, knock…it will happen.

But what are we searching for? We search for answers, guidance, expressions of love and the list goes on and on. What works for one person might not work for another but the best thing we can do is to: STUDY YOURSELF!

We are so accustomed to study all sorts of things around us and we rarely have this focus to study ourselves…but the better we get to know ourselves, the more we create a powerful dialogue inside our mind. We will identify our limiting beliefs and why they even exist.

We are here to serve one another and yes, you can make time for so many beautiful things in this World.

You learn how to give 100% to yourself and then you meet a friend to whom you offer 100% and then you choose a partner to whom you give 100%. You can be loyal to others when you remain loyal to yourself.

How can we figure it out if we are on the right track? The answer I once heard from a wise woman was something like: “You don’t ask anybody what should you do, you lead yourself by listening to your own voice.”

Maybe “THAT VOICE” must be discovered in silence, in repetition, in “Thank you!”, in walking, in journaling, in conversations with people that have the qualities we want to acquire or improve.

It’s quite nice to study yourself and it takes patience. We are flawed people and we are created to connect with other flawed people. Beauty happens in between.

It’s in your own power to make a white space for yourself. Take a step back and stay at peace because you’ll need more power for some new ten steps ahead.

When you get to rewire your thinking and insert new beliefs inside your mind, even if it takes you three months, three years or ten years, you are landing where you are supposed to be. You have your own script, I have my own script, a person who lives in the jungle has their own script.

Regarding words, I remember a story told by one of my teachers. She had a lovely grandmother that didn’t know how to write. When my teacher left her small town to study, she started to receive letters from her granny and they were all looking the same.

“Dear Maria,

Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria,

Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria,

Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria, Maria.”

She didn’t know how to write her own name, but the beloved teacher understood everything her grandmother was writing and I think that’s wonderful! Each time she was reading this letter, tears rolled down her eyes… Love is simple, transcends all understanding and you don’t even have to express it in complicated ways.

Reading makes you more focused, more passionate and happier. Reading makes you feel fortunate that you have two eyes and a cute brain that loves you. Some habits take something from you and some habits give you a better version of yourself. You can’t be smarter than anyone else and nobody can outsmart you from being you. That is for sure. You’ll be just fine. In all things, learn to put God first. God is like a constant promise you make to yourself, a neverending prayer of gratitude.

Each day I remember about three phrases/promises from God and they are written in the Bible…even if I haven’t managed to read it all: “I am with you always.” ; “No good thing will He withhold from those who walk uprightly.” ; “And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

It’s our own responsibility to go back in our childhood and deconstruct beliefs or phrases that we now repeat in our heads. We are no longer that child or the same person we where four years ago or even yesterday. Who told me not to like the colour red or a certain place? Everything is encrypted in our subconscious and we can change every single thing about us in order to become more like us and less like anybody else. Your own opinion about “YOU” is the only one that matters.

I am curious about what matters to me and how can I improve my life. I’m not a scientist, I’m not a teacher, I’m not a doctor, I’m not a therapist, I’m not a role model and everything I share right here is what I find interesting at the moment. I love to read and share the good stuff with others, not to look smart, not to portray “an image”.

We plant good seeds, we share information and we learn to remain open because good things will follow us. You give what you are and you are not supposed to be perfect.

Enjoy the list:

  • Joe Dispenza and Ed Mylett talk about how many wonders can MEDITATION/PRAYING or being thankful does to our body.
  • Another perspective about Self Development is presented by James Jani in the following link. There is a fine line between the excess of positivity and excess of negativity. We may like certain people, but it doesn’t mean we should follow their teachings. After all, nobody can lead your life, but you.
  • On my top 3 countries in this World is Japan. I admire japanese people and I appreciate evertything about them. If I can be born again, I would love to open my eyes in Japan. Ken Honda is one of the wisest when it comes to money. Arigato IN! Arigato OUT! Find some good energy about money right here.
  • Money are part of our everyday life and from where we can learn more about them? Discover Daniel Lapin right here and laugh with our lovely new-yorkaise Fran Lebowitz. By the way, you can search on Netflix “Pretend It’s a City” and enjoy her and Martin Scorsese walking and talking in New York.
  • Andrew Huberman (Professor and Neuroscientist at Stanford University and Host of the Huberman Lab Podcast) is talking about Social Media and what it does to our brain. Here is a 4 minute interview.

Best regards,

Mijournali

KNOK BOOK

Knock! Knock! Book! Book!

Within a book, within a place, within a flower.

Atomic Habits – James Clear

“Cand cariera mea in baseball s-a incheiat, am incercat sa practic alt sport. M-am alaturat unei echipe de culturisti si, intr-o zi, un antrenor de elita ne-a vizitat in sala de fitness. Lucrase cu mii de sportivi in cariera lui, cativa dintre ei olimpici. M-am prezentat si am inceput sa discutam despre procesul de perfectionare.

“Prin ce se diferentiaza sportivii de succes de ceilalti?” l-am intrebat. “Care este diferenta dintre succes si esec?”

Mi-a enumerat factorii pe care deja ii intuiesti: mostenire genetica, norocul, talentul. Dar apoi a mai adaugat ceva, la care nu ma asteptam: “La un moment dat, cand ridici aceleasi greutati la nesfarsit, totul se reduce la modul in care gestionezi monotonia antrenamentului de zi cu zi”. Raspunsul lui m-a surprins, pentru ca era o perspectiva diferita asupra eticii profesionale. Oamenii vorbesc mereu de entuziasm cand se refera la atingerea obiectivelor.

Ca vine vorba de afaceri, sport sau arta, auzi lucruri de genul: “Totul tine de pasiune”. Sau “Trebuie sa-ti doresti cu adevarat”. Drept urmare, multi cad in depresie atunci cand isi pierd concentrarea sau motivatia, deoarece ne inchipuim ca oamenii de succes au rezerve nelimitate de pasiune. Dar acest antrenor sustine ca oamenii de succes resimt lipsa motivatiei la fel ca toti ceilalti. Diferenta consta in faptul ca ei reusesc sa o mobilizeze, in ciuda plictiselii. Performanta necesita efort. Dar pe masura ce repeti o actiune, ea devine tot mai plictisitoare si rutinata. Dupa ce am obtinut cateva rezultate si stim la ce sa ne asteptam, interesul nostru incepe sa se estompeze. Uneori dispare chiar mai repede. Tot ce trebuie sa faci este sa mergi la sala cateva zile la rand sau sa publici cateva articole pe blog; daca trece o zi fara activitate, nu se va simti prea mult. Lucrurile merg bine. Poti sa-ti permiti o zi de relaxare, pentru ca te afli pe o traiectorie buna.

Cea mai mare amenintare care planeaza asupra succesului este plictiseala, nu esecul. Ne plictisim de anumite obiceiuri pentru ca nu ne mai ofera placere. Rezultatele sunt previzibile. Iar cand obiceiurile nu mai au nimic iesit din comun, abandonam progresul in cautarea noutatii. Poate de aceea intram in cercul vicios al schimbarii unui tip de antrenament cu altul, sau al trecerii de la o dieta la alta, de la o idee de afaceri la alta. De indata ce sesizam cea mai subtila scadere a motivatiei, incepem sa cautam strategii noi, chiar daca cea veche era buna. Asa cum observa Machiavelli, “Oamenii sunt atrasi de noutate in asemenea masura, incat cei ce traiesc bine isi doresc schimbarea la fel de mult ca aceia care traiesc rau”. Poate de aceea multe dintre produsele pe care ne obisnuim sa le utilizam sunt cele care ne ofera permanent ceva nou. Jocurile video ofera imagini noi. Mancarea nesanatoasa ne ofera o noutate culinara. Toate aceste experiente ne ofera mereu elemente surpriza.

In psihologie, acest fenomen se numeste recompensa variabila. Jocurile mecanice sunt cele mai comune exemple din viata reala. Un jucator de noroc castiga din cand in cand, dar niciodata la un interval de timp previzibil. Ritmul de furnizare a recompensei variaza. Aceasta variabilitate determina cresterea maxima a nivelului dopaminei, stimuleaza memoria si accelereaza formarea obiceiului. Recompense variabile in sine nu declanseaza o dorinta- adica e inutil sa oferi la un interval de timp variabil o recompensa de care cineva nu este interesat, in speranta ca in cele din urma va ajunge sa si-o doreasca – insa ele amplifica puternic dorinte deja existente, deoarece reduc monotonia.

Punctul optim al dorintei se gaseste la jumatatea distantei dintre succes si esec. Jumatate din timp obtii ceea ce vrei, jumatate nu.

Ai nevoie de o doza suficienta de “reusita” pentru a simti satisfactia, insa trebuie sa fii si suficient de motivat pentru a simti dorinta. Acesta este unul dintre beneficiile Regulii Goldilocks. Daca ai deja motivatia de a-ti forma un obicei, angajarea in provocari cu dificultate rezonabila reprezinta o buna modalitate de a combate plictiseala. Desigur, nu toate obiceiurile au o componenta de variabilitate a recompensei, si nici nu ne dorim asta. Daca Google mi-ar livra o solutie utila doar uneori, mi-as schimba motorul de cautare foarte repede. Daca Uber ar raspunde comenzilor mele numai in proportie de 50%, ma indoiesc ca as continua sa apelez la acest serviciu. Iar daca m-as spala pe dinti in fiecare seara, dar as simti senzatia de curatenie numai uneori, cred ca nu as mai face-o. Cu recompense variabile sau nu, niciun obicei nu ni se va parea interesant la nesfarsit. La un moment dat, cu totii intampinam anumite dificultati pe drumul autoperfectionarii. Trebuie sa te indragostesti de plictiseala. Cu totii avem obiective pe care vrem sa le implinim, dar nici nu conteaza in ce domeniu vrei sa devii mai bun, daca faci eforturi numai cand iti vine la indemana sau cand esti entuziasmat, pentru ca nu vei fi suficient de consecvent incat sa obtii rezultate remarcabile. Iti garantez ca daca reusesti sa-ti formezi si sa mentii un obicei, vor exista si zile in care vei fi tentat sa renunti. Cand incepi o afacere, vor fi zile cand nu vei avea chef sa lucrezi; daca faci sport, vor fi zile cand nu vei dori sa completezi anumite seturi de exercitii; daca trebuie sa scrii ceva, nu iti va veni sa tastezi. Dar consecventa – ii diferentiaza pe profesionisti de amatori.”

Best regards,

Mijournali!

KNOK BOOK

Knock! Knock! Book! Book!

Within a book, within a place, within a flower.

Old World Italian – Mimi Thorisson

“The two guilty pleasures of Italian eating both start with the letter A. Sometimes there is no distinction between them, especially nowadays. Aperitivo is both the moment when you have your pre-dinner drink and the drink itself. It just means work is over, fun and food will be lad. And some of that food will be had now. All the usual suspects: olives, mini pizzas, deept-fried delicacies, some veggies thrown in for good measure. Basically, all the food that your personal trainer-if you’re unlucky, or disciplined, enough to have one – will tell you not to eat. Apperitivo in its purest form is a vertical affair, standing up, because you still can.

There is Antipasti, the other A: You’re in the restaurant or at home, and by now you are surely sitting down. Curious concocticons have given way to wine. That’s an absolute. This is the hour of really good hams, carefully prepared vegetables, quality crostini, cold salads, mixed seafood perhaps. You go for sparkling or you go straight to still. I have long thought that the most elegant thing anyone can have at this moment of the meal is the finest culatello and a very good glass of sparkling wine. Go for all the other stuff at your own peril and your own pleasure.”

“The inside is not striking, but it’s pleasant, classic, simple, which can be, and often is, more striking than…striking. Everything is unsurprising, and that’s a good thing. There are some signs that this establishment is more upscale than down-white tablecloths and napkins, a bit more shine. The waiters could be wearing white jackets and black bow ties. If they are you, you are probably in a city or a historical holiday place, somewhere the jet-setters used to go and maybe still do.”

“A really special restaurant is almost impossible to create quickly. It needs time. It needs, in cooking terms, to sit. The longer, the better. A concept is a clever idea that someone had.

A great restaurant has its own ideas, evolving organically over time, and Italy is full of places like that. When I visit friends in what they call “major cities,” they usually have lined up for us the best places, the most happening, the awesome. And next time we come, they have new awesomes. It’s about ticking things off a list: Go there once, then go someplace else. Never be caught dead in last week’s world. Now “there” is somewhere else. Not better but newer. A real restaurant needs regulars. No place that requires anyone to reserve three months in advance will ever have those. The staff won’t stay. They, too, will go on the next big thing. Like rats from a sinking ship, they know before anyone that it won’t last. Something more exciting is around the corner. Except it’s not.”

“Imagine you are somewhere in Italy. It’s around noon and you’re hungry. You are looking for a good place to eat and you know where to go. They know your name and your appetites and your favorite place to sit. They bring the aperitivo you like and one day you don’t even need to glance at the dessert cart. You know what’s on it. And you know what you’ll take. They know it, too. And if the place is crowded, there’s a chance that someone else might want it, too, so they’ll save you a slice. A place that saves you a slice, that’s the Italian restaurant.”

Best regards,

Mijournali!

THIS AND THAT

We don’t want everything we like, we just remember the beautiful things.

We like this and that this week:

  • Olivia Cognet creates a sculptural dialog between her hands and thoughts. We are talking about a very talented French artist who does wonders in terms of ceramic. (objects including chairs, vases, lamps and tables). Handmade is the main character of her expression and these objects really talk. You can listen a nice conversation about her work right here and view what kind of objects she creates on Instagram: @olivia_cognet

  • Have you ever thought about watching/listening primordial activities while you create, travel, rest, work or study? It’s nice how these natural sounds give us a sense of belonging, quietness and even warmth. Anh Bushcraft shares with us an interesting frame about this kind of living. Another person that I enjoy watching is Honeyjubu. She is South Korean. A lifestyle that inspires serenity and brings visual comfort to many people. You can read more about it here. Enjoy!

  • There is one famous french photographer named JR that has made a video of him while he was visiting a prison somewhere in North America. The artist offered an expression of care to these people by bringing a special project alive. Imagine all the prisoners gathered together in the courtyard, enjoying an orange and seeing their portraits instead of the usual grey walls of the building. Art does magic! You can discover a nice interview with JR and Agnes Varda and on his Instragram page you can identify the prison project.

  • A special green object took my attention this week. Polspotten designed this unique and elegant piece from glass named The Steps Vase.

Best regards,

Mijournali!

THERE’S ONLY TODAY

I couldn’t think of anyone better than Mister Rogers at this delicate time.

“Love is at the root of everything. Love or the lack of it.”

We all care about humans, about children, about everyone who is suffering.

What inspires peace if not people coming together with acts of kindness and love for one another?

I’ve watched long time ago what Fred Rogers prepared for humanity and especially for the little ones. Children must be taught about unfortunate events in a subtle manner and they must be assured that they are safe.

This is an important phrase that we must teach everybody around us (starting with ourselves),but especially our future-the children: “When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, “Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.”

  • Type this title on YouTube: Fred Rogers: Look for the Helpers
  • Type this title on YouTube: Fred Rogers Talk About Sad and Scary Things.
  • And this video is a statement for those who are willing to learn how to use power or fame in a good way.

And here is another powerful documentary with Gabor Mate: “The wisdom of trauma”.

May this be your kind of day!

Best regards,

Mijournali!